....and so those insomnia nights go....
insomnia night 1 : words are not important…
The girl was busy making a big mug of hot coffee.
“want some coffee mix?”
“Yes, please…” answered the guy.
She took two smaller mugs,
and poured hot coffee she just made…
“here..”
They went outside and sat side by side on the front stairs
Talked about nonsense
Laughed …
They both had insomnia
And tried to kill time together.
……
“I like you.”, out of topic, the guy suddenly said.
The girl turned her head
“What? What did you say?”
“Nothing…” the guy stood up and smiled, “I gotta go home, i'm sleepy!”
“Don’t you dare!” the girl grabbed his hand.
…
The girl sighed.
“don’t you feel tired?” she asked.
“Of what?” the guy sat back, starred at the girl.
“Being a hypocrite, you.. silly!”
“What do you mean?”
“Why don’t you be honest to yourself, why don’t u just tell what you really want to tell, say what you really mean!!”
…………..
The guy sighed
“Okay. Yes, I like you, I care about you a lot “
“and?”
“yeah, I miss you also..”
“and?”
“and what? I said : I like you, I care about you and I miss you..”
“actually you don't have to say that...I know it..” said the girl “by the way, did you tell the truth?” she grinned.
“yeah! Are you happy now?”
The girl laughed
“Now, Why do you laugh? What makes you laugh?”
“It’s you…”
……….
“After telling the truth… do you feel relieved?” the girl asked again.
“Yeah,”
“good… stop denying your feelings and try to say those truths again sometime!”
“hey, don’t make jokes on that!”
….
Eventough after that night, he never said those truths anymore and always avoided to answer by changing the topic of conversations, but he seems to try hard to show his feelings by his attentions and actions. And the girl starts to understand, words are not that important…., and she really enjoys the way he treats her….
insomnia night 2 : about waiting for destiny.
Another insomnia night, the girl and the guy still sat together, side by side on the same front stairs.
They didn’t talk at all.
The girl looked above, watched the starry night sky.
In the middle of silence,
Suddenly the guy said…
“I always believe that God provides my soul mate, she’s somewhere out there.”
“Yeah, so do I.” the girl answered.
…
“But have you ever tried to find out who she is?” asked the girl.
“Hmm, I just pray, He’ll give me the clues. You?”
“I never pray, I know God knows already everything I need, inlcuding my soulmate!” the girl kept looking above, hoping that she’s lucky enough to find a falling star, and made a secret wish about the guy who was sitting beside her.
…
“So, how do you know if the right one comes…?” The guy asked
“My heart…. God will talk thru my heart… hey, Have God answered your prayer and give any clues?”
“let’s say…He works in His time.., and his time is not now….how about you, has your heart told you something?”
“yeah, I guess..”
“that guy, eh?”
“yeah.. I guess..”but she started to doubt it
“are u sure it really comes from your heart?”
“yeah..”
“are u sure your emotion doesn’t pervert it?”
….
The girl sighed, “I..ehm.. I dunno…!”
…….
“I want to sleep.. and, hey, by the way, God can give you clues thru anything, Make sure that you’re sensitive enough to sense.” she stood up and walked into the house.
Insomnia night 3 : On The Phone – a midnight call : about accepting herself.
He : So, what about your inspiration?
She : what about him?
He : Where is he now? Never heard about him from you lately
She : Dunno.. and I don’t think I want to know.
He : Really? (laugh)
She : What?
He : but you’ve sworn, you would never forget him… you wouldn’t be able to love others as much as you love him..
She : I change my mind then..
He : ready to open your heart for others,eh?
She : May be….
He : (laugh) you should!
She : keep laughing! Go on, bug me!
He : Okay, I’ll go on… hey, I always know you as a strong minded and independent woman,
She : you don’t have to replace ‘stubborn’ with strong minded.. (laugh)
He : okay, , I always know you as a stubborn and pig headed girl….Quite surprising to find out you became that weak when you’re in love
She: shut up!
He: I’m not going to shut up …. (laugh)
She : talk to the wall then!
He : (laugh)
She : I’m not really lucky in love stuffs.
He : (stop laughing) huh?
She : I mean, I’ve never stayed with one guy for such a long time… it always ended up with hurt or being hurt! (sigh) what’s with those creatures named : guys?
He: what’s with them? Hey… it’s what’s with you…
She: ehm, yeah, may be it’s what’s with me…. I got curse! (laugh)
He : there’s no such curse! But, yeah.. there’s something wrong with you..
She : yeah, find me a shrink, then! Recommend me the good one,please…
He : what I’m trying to tell you is, you need to accept yourself first, before you can accept other in your life.
She : huh? Sorry? My brain’s a lil bit dead… I don’t get it… I accepting myself? I AM Accepting myself
He : Hey, no you’re not….. listen to me : don’t be too hard to yourself , just sit back and relax, don’t put your expectations too high, , don’t push yourself to be perfect, don’t make qualifications, don’t make justifications, shall I go on?
She : Whatever… up to you…
He : be stable, feel satisfied and comfortable with yourself, don’t think that you’re irresistable, stop being arrogant..
She : well, how long have you prepared that list? Anything else?
He : No, it’s enough for now …by the way.. after you do those things, ..then, you can start a true relationship by accepting your partner just the way he is…. And eventough you have to break up, you wouldn’t end up with hurt or being hurt…
…….
She : why do I start to think that you’re always right…
He : because I am…
She : hey, do you think you are always right, smart guy?
He : yeah!
She : talk to my hands then!
He : (laugh) by the way, what about your inspiration…
She : (sigh) that question again! Well.. he’s fine I guess, his friend told me that he’s already got new girlfriend, are you happy now?
He : and you? Why don’t you have a new boyfriend?
She : should I?
He : no. you shouldn’t!
She : yeah, I know.. I won’t start a relationship with the wrong reasons. I’ll wait until my heart really tells something….
He : you’re getting smarter!
She : -Pfft-
He : do you hate him?
She : nope, not anymore…. Why should I? He’s not the one for me…
He : you really are getting smarter….
…..
He : By the way, let’s go out tomorrow…
She: for what?
He : tommorow is valentine’s day…
She : So?
He : yeah, let’s celebrate it….
She : (laugh) you know I never celebrate it…
He : So, try to celebrate it, with me,.. silly!
She : Oh, okay… what are u gonna do? Preparing candle light dinner, giving me roses or candies?
He : yeah something like that, and…. I’m gonna propose you..
She : well, if so.. the answer is no…. I’m not going out with you…
He : Nahh, just kidding, how can I propose a girl who doesn’t love me?… and are u sure you don’t want to go out with me? Coz probably tomorrow will be our last going out…
She : are you going away again?
He : Yeah….
She : *sigh* Okay, I’m going out with you.. so it’s a date, huh?!
….
--- end of insomnia nights ---
she really thanks him for those lessons he gave. He had opened her heart and changed her point of views about herself and about relationship. And while getting ready for the date, she starts to feel that he’s the one…..She hopes, someday, after this last date, they could meet, and at that time, she would never let him go again…., ever!
Yeah, someday, may be….
have a very nice valentine's day, guys!
